What this work is really about is the behavior compulsions which results from patriarchal societal pressures which lead to abusive social patterns, both to self and others and especially women, and, alas, a spectrum of personal habits that are more or less abusive or coercive in nature. These are the conditions we need to understand if we are going to change them and build a better society.
Sexism is political so when women say we live in a sexist society that means there are laws that support our patriarchal society’s firm belief that women should not be afforded the same bodily autonomy as men.
Gender is a construct, just like racism. They are both mechanisms of exclusion (creating poverty) for the purpose of wealth accumulation for their employer.
Misogyny is the law enforcement arm of the patriarchy (borrowed line). That doesn’t go far enough, though. Patriarchal Feminism (white women centered feminism) does not address it’s role in what we can more accurately rephrase the borrowed line: misogynoir is the law enforcement arm of the patriarchy. Accurate because it forces white american women to be held accountable for their role in upholding these systems of unrighteousness. Addressing our relationship to upholding misogynoir is where we must do the most work in terms of de-conditioning ourselves away from intensely unfair and unfavorable identities imposed on Black American women and Native women (sidenote: misogynoir is societal level and violence aimed at Black American women, especially, along with women from the diaspora).
In order to begin this work we must grapple with how we consume our ideas of women. Consume don’t always mean money, neither.
In order for this work to have a chance at success our second agreement after choosing to hold ourselves to a higher standard, we have to do this work away from and without women.
We do our own labor.
It is my theory that if we as men, especially cismen, especially straight cismen, can assume FULL responsibility for our emotional and intellectual labor, misogyny/misognynoir will be deactivated in social spaces sooner than later.
By assuming this responsibility as individuals, we begin to do the work of building a community, that will ultimately be adjacent to women, where mutuality, partnership, collaboration are all prioritized over competition for the purpose of wealth accumulation.
When a majority of men are willing and able to assume this responsibility, which was stolen from him and forced onto the embodiment of women, the most revolutionary act that can happen will begin to happen: women and feminine identifying persons can begin to use their imagination in a way that doesn’t cater to men, they own their future just like us.
What is intellectual and emotional labor?
Thank you for reading. I love you.
SOME STATEMENTS TO GRAPPLE WITH:
Claiming that all Transgender bodies possess inherent insurrectionary potential places the impetus upon transgender individuals to serve a revolutionary purpose, without regard for their own safety, survival, or preference. This perspective places the responsibility for critiquing and challenging gender norms upon Transgender Persons alone; cisgender individuals are, then, exempt from the expectation to use their genders for revolutionary purpose.
Claiming that all Black bodies possess inherent insurrectionary potential places the impetus upon Black folks to serve a revolutionary purpose without regard for their own safety, survival, or preference. This perspective places the responsibility for critiquing and challenging racial stereotypes (patriarchal masculinity/patriarchy) upon Black folks alone; non-white, non-black folks and poor white folks are, then, exempt from the expectation to use their privilege of being non-Black for revolutionary purpose and/or rooting out anti-blackness.
Claiming that all female and feminine identifying bodies possess inherent insurrectionary potential places the impetus upon female and feminine identifying to serve a revolutionary purpose without regard for their own safety, survival, or preference. This perspective places the responsibility for critiquing and challenging patriarchal masculinity/patriarchal femininity/patriarchy upon female and feminine identifying folks; males and masculinity identifying folks are, then, exempt from challenging their own patterns of sexism and participation in upholding the abstraction of consent.
If you’d like to support this project, anywhere from $5-$20 (website upkeep, paying guest contributors or the overall cause of intelectual community building away from patriarchal masculinity and patriarchal femininity) you can send that to:
Soft Heart Collective: @S-H-C (venmo)